• berkshirelifecoach

Ditching Imposter Syndrome

Updated: Nov 26, 2021

Michelle Pfeifer said

“I still think people will find out that I’m really not very talented.

I’m really not very good. It’s all been a big sham.”

Maya Angelou said

“I have written eleven books, but each time I think, ‘uh oh, they’re going to find out now. I’ve run a game on everybody, and they’re going to find me out’.”

YOU have something unique to offer, and your way of delivering your offer, is unique! Nobody else can do it exactly like you. There are people struggling with something in their life, who really need to hear your story, your experience, your ‘youness'. You have ideas and learning to share with other people and someone out there really needs to hear your message right now.

It may help you in your confidence-building journey to remember that being confident in yourself does not require you to believe — much less to state — that you are an expert or a visionary.

Expertise is in the eye of the beholder! Let other people call you an expert. When you talk or write about yourself, you can simply tell us about you and your offer.

Here are some reasons smart and capable people doubt themselves:

· They have learned from experts, and they don’t want to put themselves in that category.

· They know that their expertise and their wisdom are only a small part of what makes them who they are. They would never be cocky about their education or their experiences.

· They know that there is vast wisdom in every person. They don’t want to make any conversation all about them.

· They tend to focus on the experiences or credentials they don’t have, rather than on the ones they do.

· They are uncomfortable in the limelight.

· They may have lost confidence over something that happened in their career or personal lives

· They don’t have good role models, mentors or supporters to tell them “You are awesome!” They haven’t learned how to carry their confidence easily on their shoulders.

Things that help:

· Accept that you have had some role in your successes. You did something to get where you are now.

· Focus on providing value.

· Re-read your client testimonials, they prove your knowledge, skill & experience provides value to others.

· Stop comparing yourself to that person. There’s no good reason for you to be reading what I’m writing. There are world class biographies out there, but still, I’m writing this because I think I have something to offer. When you compare yourself to others it’s easy to fall into the trap of “my life sucks compared to that life”. Your life isn’t the best life! Comparison is the thief of joy! You aren’t here to live the life of another person. You’re here to live YOUR life and express YOUR UNIQUE GIFTS & TALENTS.

· Remember: being wrong doesn’t make you a fake. Losing is just part of the game. Don’t glorify failure, but don’t let it make you feel like you’re not a real contender either.

· Realise that when you hold back you’re robbing the world. Someone needs the benefit of what you have to offer; but you need to offer it first!

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